I'm So Behind!

WOD #72 June 27th
This doesn't have a name, but I call it Shit-Show, because it caught me off-guard...I was holding my right side (I think I popped a stitch) but the 3rd round and had to quit. :(

5 rounds
Row 200
12 Push Press (15 lbs dumbbells)
8 KB Swings (20 lbs)
4 Burpees

I did 2 full rounds and 8 kb swings. Don't even know the time.

WOD #73 June 30th
Fake Cindy. This went GREAT! I even smiled during the WOD!

AMRAP 20 Min
5 Ring Rows
7 Knee push ups
9 squats
10 rounds and 7 push ups

WOD #74
Row as far as you can in 20 min
3390 m

Not too shabby.

Guess Who's Back?

That's me!

It's been hard. In fact, I'm not totally cleared (unless lifting weights less than 20 lbs counts, which it most certainly does not). I have to have another invasive test in the next week or so, as well. But I'm getting there.

Today was my first day back, and I was nervous! It felt great, though. While I was gone, the boys moved gyms, so that was amazing to see, too. It is so beautiful!

WOD #71
3 full rounds and 13 meters rowed

As many rounds as possible in 15 minutes of:
250 m Row
20 Sit-up (abmat)s
15 Kettlebell Swings 20 lbs
7 Body Rows

I am now behind on my WODs if I'm going to make 200 in a year, but I WILL DO IT!

Crossfit I Miss You!

So, I'm still out. Surgery isn't until the 3rd of June. And OMG I'm going crazy. My mom and sister are here and really are "helping".

I will be so ready to come back, let me tell you!

Hanging In There

To say I'm nervous and depressed would be an understatement.

I had an ultrasound yesterday, and they aren't supposed to tell you what they see. However, the woman accidentally hit the cyst that has been bothering me at just the right point and I practically jumped off of the table. She confirmed that there was a cyst and that it was on a follicle. (I don't know what that means exactly).

At this point I just want to get the surgery over with. Seriously. I want to have energy back and I want to be able to work out without fears of something in my body exploding (I doubt that that is how it works, but...it sure feels that way!)

Broken

So, after four and a half months of keeping up my goal to do 200 WODs in a year, I have some crappy news. I'm having surgery sometime next week and won't be able to work out for a MONTH! I'm going crazy. I have some issues I won't go into (girl troubles, lol) and I'm not looking forward to this surgery. At all.

Wish me luck! I'll be around. I'm definitely going to try and do my best to walk as much as possible. EEK.

Work It Out

Kinda behind posting, as per usual...Here are my last 2 WODs.

WOD #70 May 6th
30:11

5 rounds for time:
15 ring rows
15 push press 43lb
15 back squat 65lb

WOD #71 May 9th
20:16

Row 500m
21 0HS (23lb)
45 sit-ups
21 kb swings (35lb)
Row 250m
15 OHS (23lb)
45 sit-ups
15 kb swings (35lb)
Row 500m

Running With The Big Kids

WOD #69
29:59

2 rounds for time of:
Run 100 meters
25 Box jumps 12″
Run 100 meters
25 Sit-ups
Row 200 meters
25 Walking lunge
Run 100 meters
75 Singles

Pros: I did 2 rounds of 25 box jumps. That is not easy for me.

Cons: The runs were ok on the first round, but I had a hard time with them on the second round, especially on the transistion from run to box jump or lunge to run!

This was a hard WOD, but I did this with the class (although I scaled it from 3 rounds to 2). The box jumps were so hard on me that literally there were people on their double unders once I finished the first 25! I would of loved to do a 3rd round, but I would of been another 15 minutes out, and that doesn't work right for the idea of scaling...as it was, I finished about 9 minutes after the average person. I am proud of myself that I didn't chicken out on taking this with the class. Also, I so love that Crossfit people don't judge and just let me do my WOD even if I suck. :)

Head Games

Date: May 2nd
Wod# 68

Michael 18:11
3 rounds:
200 m run
25 back extensions
25 ab mat situps

Pros: I have never done 25 back extensions, let alone 3 rounds.

Cons: Everything else.

The first round of running was fabulous, but by the time I finished the back extensions I wanted to die. It was killing me. I wish I had hustled harder on round 2 and 3, but in the moment, the pain was just too much. My back was really burning. Live and learn, I guess. After the WOD, I had to row 1000m for time (which, incidentally, I didn't write down the time, and I know I went as slow as possible because my back was KILLING me). I kept standing up to stretch my back out. I also was given the assignment of 50 burpees, because I just didn't capture the "intensity" that Shain wanted. I only had time to do 15, but I am going to yoga early today to do the rest.

Danny and I, even on the Zone, ate out WAY too much last month. This month, we are cutting down on sushi to once a week, and that is our ONE dining out a week. I made lasagna again this weekend, and this morning, I threw salmon in the fridge to defrost with a bit of olive oil, soy sauce, and white wine. I have no idea if that will be good for a marinade, but I will brush it with mustard and soy sauce before I cook it.

I went to the endrocrinologist again today. I'm still not regulated, and I'm really frustrated. All I can do is eat right and work out. But, it's disheartening. It's not as if I'm doing anything to screw up my thyroid, that is on it's own, but...my body drives me crazy.

I also saw my infertility specialist. I told her how I had been pondering Paleo, and she said NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. I guess the Zone is better for PCOS. I'm really going to bust my butt the next few months. It's hard when I get so emotional, between exhaustion, medical issues, and everything else. She said I need to be nicer to myself. That made me cry. LOL. Surprise.

Is There Ever Gonna Be A Day Where I Don't Get Nervous Before A Crossfit Workout?? Just Curious

This post is about my 67th WOD since January 1st.

TJ once told me that if I'm not nervous before a workout, it's probably not intense enough.

Even so, I think it is so funny that my body reacts the same everytime I turn onto the streets leading to Crossfit. I get a stomach ache. I get tense. Even if I wanted to focus on something else, I couldn't, because I'm so overwhelmed by the thoughts of what I'm going to put my body through during the next hour. I also play this game. "In one hour and 4 minutes, I will be laying on the ground..." So crazy.

Yesterday, I did Cindy pretty much RX'd, with the exception of doing ring rows instead of pull-ups. I did the full twenty minutes. It went great. The hand release push-ups get me EVERY single time, but I think that they will have to get easier. Someday.

WOD #67
Cindy- 8 rounds, 9 push-ups

AMRAP 20 min
5 ring rows
10 push ups (hand release)
15 squats

Compare to:

WOD #35 (3/6/11)
Cindy 7 full rounds, 5 ring-rows and 5 push-ups
5 Ring-rows
10 Push-ups
15 Squats

In My Father's Footsteps? Over My Dead Body

I don't talk about this a lot, but it's been on my mind.

My dad weighs over five hundred pounds.

Like, probably six hundred pounds.

In today's world, he is big. But, sadly, you see people like him. Not daily, but enough that you don't drop everything and say "OH MY GD".

But growing up in the '80s, like I did, it wasn't normal. I remember walking a few steps ahead of him everywhere we went. I would have a menacing look on my face, DARING people to stare at him. I would run ahead in restaurants, to make sure we could get seats that didn't have arms, and that weren't too out in the open, but at the same time, not too much of a walk back. He couldn't walk that far.

My dad has a sense of humor as big as his stomach. Seriously. He literally would tell people that he was a recovering anorexic, and that he was proud of his recovery. He never seemed to eat TOO much in public, but had no problem talking about his favorite foods, restaurants, or what he ate last night. He was shameless! Have you ever noticed that "fat" people never talk about food? It's like they don't want you to think that they actually eat.

I went through an anorexic phase, and I remember going to visit him. I wsa going to be there for 3 days, which meant roughly 5 workouts. My dad was about to turn 50 and thought it would be fun to join. (He was lighter then, maybe 400 lbs.) He went with me, and for a brief moment in time, we had something in common.

You see, when I was growing up, my dad didn't really do anything with me or my siblings. He worked crazy hours, and when he was home, you could find him on the couch. "Quality time" meant praying, eating, or long drives. (He was a car afficiando). I have no memories of doing physical activities with my dad. I know he coached my brother's soccer team, but that was more for the folly of it, and there were other coaches that actually knew the sport.

At my sister's wedding, he was to do the father/daughter dance with her. There was a glitch in the technical system, however, which left him standing, painfully still, for over 30 seconds. He couldn't handle the agony and sat down, and my brother filled in. My dad never spoke of that moment, but I know it killed him. We aren't close, (for many other reasons), so this wasn't an issue at my wedding. He did, however, roll a wheelchair down the aisle.

Why am I writing about all of this now? Because I am at the age when I will try to have kids in the next year or so. And I worry. I am no where near his size, but I know genes are genes.

I am making a promise, from here until forever. Being on the Zone and Crossfitting can't be novelties to me. And, sometimes, I feel like they are. Not because I don't love Crossfit, or the energy and power the Zone gives me, but because, somewhere deep inside, I think I feel like I have been sentenced to following in his shoe steps. And I WON'T DO IT.

When I do something "big", like get my double unders, or run a 400m, no one is more surprised than me. Because I feel like a 600 lb shadow of a man. I don't think I've ever realized that, until right this minute. But I'm as much of a Crossfitter as anyone else at the box. I am earning my title as an athlete with every WOD.


I am going to be a healthy mom and wife. I will be able to ride bikes with my kids, and do Disneyland, and go all over the world. I have to. Because I don't want to be standing in a room of people, all staring at me, wondering if the lifestyle I chose was worth not being able to be a good parent to my child.

Playing Catch Up

I've been a little behind on blogging, so I just want to get these posted and then I will get back to being a more regular blogger come tomorrow. We started the Zone challenge thru the box yesterday! YAY! I'm ready.

April 21, 2011
WOD #63
Max effort 500m row
2:23 (PR by 9 seconds!)

WOD #64
AMRAP: 15 minutes
5 rounds, 4 wall balls

5 Cleans 53lb
15 situps
10 wall balls

April 25, 2011

WOD #65
Nancy
5 Rds for time: 11:27

Run 100m
15 OHS 23 lbs

Skills Day: Or, Where I Just Walk Around The Box!

Yesterday, I had an appointment to train at 6 PM. I left work at 5:20 and got to the box a little early, with enough time to do some mobility work and also practice my double unders. I wanted to be relaxed and in a good mood for whatever Shain and TJ had for me.

Right at 6:00, TJ said, "Rachel, I screwed up. Can you train with the class?" The WOD was Michael: 3 rounds of 800m run, 50 KB swings, and 50 sit-ups. I was like, absolutely not. (That's the Crossfit spirit, right?!) He said he could train me alongside the class, but I said I could just do skills.

I first decided to do a max effort 1K row. Not my favorite thing, but I've heard before that you should target your least favorite skills when you have time, and I did. I put my i-Pod on and blasted a little hip-hop, and lo and behold, pr'd by 5 seconds. I am thinking that music is my secret weapon for rowing and running. I need a good beat to zone out, and Metallica/Creed/Nickleback/blah is just not doing it for me.

WOD #62
Max Row 1000m
5:22

I then kind of wandered around. LOL. If I had been prepared, I would of done a WOD like 5 rounds for time, WB/situps or something to that effect. But I was kind of discombobulated and ended up doing 10 sets of 5 ring rows, some sit ups, some hand release pushups, and some more double unders. It wasn't a waste, but I defintely realized that I need a plan when I go to the gym!

I also went and hung out at Cassie/Kellie's last night, and Cassie told me to try double unders with her cable rope. SUCH A DIFFERENCE. I have to get one. I am scared to death for when I whip myself, but I got a DU on my second try, and that is so much faster than what crap I've done lately. The last two days have definitely made me feel better about where I am, and I am so grateful!

And I'm Back Again!

As I mentioned earlier, I've been in a funk. On top of that, my last two WODs have not been my best, so I had the added stress of "when am I ever gonna rock a workout again?!" that I tend to feel after I suck. Seriously not fun. The old Rachel would of put off coming back to the box, but I was not trying to procrastinate if I could help it. I wanted to get back in the game, because I would hate to waste all of the effort I've put in this year. I am nowhere near where I want to be, but I can be proud of my consistency and, as of late, my diet.

My last Xfit total was 386 on 1-14-11. My goal today was 420. And...I beat it! Not only that, but I deadlifted 203 lbs. Shain and I were laughing...my first deadlift was 83 lbs, back in February of 2010. :)

So I feel a lot better today. I'm glad I went. I still didn't improve that much on my shoulder press, which is irritating but its where I'm at. My next goal for the Total is 470.

WOD #61
Crossfit Total
429 lbs (44lb PR!)
173 backsquat
53 lb shoulder press
203 lb deadlift

Also: I just looked at my post from the last Crossfit Total and I wrote that my desired goal for the next time I did the WOD was 410. I'm really glad I wrote that, because I bust through it! It feels good to see when I make a goal and am able to beat it.

I Don't Want To Talk About It

So I've not been having an easy time with life. This is not a bloggy blog, where I discuss my life in general, so I won't be talking about that stuff here. Needless to say, I have not been having an easy time. Thursday, I tried to shake it off. I went in and thought I'd try to run. I even brought my head phones so that I could try to go faster than usual. It worked. I got a PR on my 400m (YAY!) and was really excited. But then for some reason the stress I've been going through got to me and it was not pretty. The WOD I did next wasn't that hard, but it got to me. After 3 rounds I tried to quit but luckily Shain wouldn't let me.

Friday I got to the gym and was excited to redeem myself. No such luck. I ran an 800 and then the shit hit the fan. I DNF'd on the workout, and I am really upset about it. I hate that I can't separate the shit going on in my life and the WOD at hand.

WOD #58 4/14/11
400m
2:45 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

WOD #59
19:58
5 Rounds:
5 snatch 43 lb
Run 100 m
15 box jump (8 stacked mats)


WOD #60 4/15/11
6:59
Run 800m

Dear Crossfit

Dear CrossFit,

I like that you push me. That you shove me around. That you don’t listen to my whining, my excuses, my belly-aching.

When I say, “This is hard” . . . you say, “Do it again.”

When I say, “But I’m not good at this” . . . you say, “So, practice. Get good.”

When I say “This hurts” . . . you say, “So does life. Get over it.”

You poke me in the chest, you kick me in the ass, you drive me over the edge.

And I love every single flippin’ minute of it. Even as I hate it too.

If I wanted my workout to hug me and make me feel special, I’d be rocking some jazzeryoga40x in my basement. With some chamomile tea. And a blankie.

But I’m not here for the party. I’m here because I don’t need another person in life to tell me that I’m special and I’m good enough and I’m wonderful. (I mean, don’t stop with that, my ego kinda digs it.) But I want the truth. I can handle it. And I can handle the work to make myself better.

I don’t have a muscle-up. And I needed to be reminded of that, and the many other things I need to motor on.

See, CrossFit, we understand each other. Keep pushing me, don’t ever stop.

XOXOXOXO

Me
(from Crossfit Lisbeth...I love her!)

Dude, Where's Your Brain?

As I've mentioned before, I've been taking yoga as a compliment to my Crossfit classes. This is important to me because 1) I suck at stretching, 2) I definitely need the relaxation and 3) it gives me a guarenteed "date" night with one of my best friends once a week. One think that is hard about yoga is that you can't gague your progress the way you can with Crossfit. Whereas you might be able to reach further during a stretch, or hold something longer, it isn't something that you write down or that anyone else is paying attention to, so at the end of the hour, its all about how you feel. I have to let go of comparing myself to the other girls in the class. The bodies in the room are flawless, and mine isn't. It can be distracting, when I catch sight of myself in the mirror and start calling myself mean names. I realize that the whole point of working out is to become stronger and happier with myself, and I'm not doing that at this point. I still feel like my body is my enemy, and it is frustrating.

Today, however, I am going to celebrate that I was able to get together breakfast, lunch, and 2 snacks (all Zoned) for work. I did, though, forget my gym bag at home. When I got to work, I realized that I left my work keys on my desk, thus locking myself out. I had to call a co-worker to come rescue me, because I get to work first. I also had to reschedule Crossfit for tomorrow, because it is not really feasible to drive all the way home to get my clothes to get back to the box to do a WOD on a work night. But a friend who has keys to my house is going to bring my workout clothes to yoga, which is where she is going, so I can at least do yoga tonight. Serenity now. I'm really trying to get my act together. It's just hard when I am the biggest space case! Today I will focus on the positive things I am doing for myself and let go of the chaos that is swirling around me.

Back on Track

After two days of not really Zoning as well as I should, I feel crappy and ready to be back. I went to Sunrise Cafe this morning to get an omlette (I didn't get home until 9:30 last night...I'm too old to get my food organized that late!) I feel a lot better knowing I'm back and eating right. It wasn't that I was eating junk for the last two days, but I really wasn't having the right combo of fats, carbs and protein. Not fun.

WOD #56
Front Squat 5-5-5-5-5
53-58-63-68-73

This was cool because I hate hate hate front squats. I have an issue with the rack position...namely, I can't really support it. I am uber-flexible but this position just doesn't work for my body. But I ended up being able to get some practice in today. And I looked back to WOD #27 (February) and saw Front squat 3-3-3 58-68-68...this is a big improvement! Things like that help me to feel like I'm getting somewhere.

WOD #57 4 Rounds, 4 Squats
As many rounds as possible in 15 minutes of:
200 m Row
15 Air Squats
10 Dumbbell Push Presses 10 lbs
5 Kettlebell Swings 35 lbs

I'm so glad that I've become consistent with my WODs and eating. If I had been keeping this blog since I started Crossfit, there would not be as much of a steady improvement the way there is now. The truth is I am fighting a crappy disease (Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome or PCOS) that causes weight gain. It can be really depressing and for awhile I gave into the depression. But I've realized that every time I give into the disease, the terrorists win. And I'm not going down without a fight.

FGB and Other Madness

WOD #55 Body Weight FGB
Perform 3 rounds for max reps of the following:

Box jump - 1min
Push Up - 1min
Sit Up - 1min
Row - 1min
Ring row - 1min

Rest 1 minute in between rounds. Post total reps.

This was actually a FUN WOD. It went really fast, which is always a plus. I was able to do the entire thing on a 12 in box, instead of stacked gym mats. All good things.

Sunday I worked on the extra cardio we had promised to do on the Zone Challenge. I took the dog out and walked 4 miles in 1 hour and ten minutes. I didn't run but I definitely went as fast as I could. It was a great time and a total change from my workouts as of late.

Drink The Crossfit Kool-Aid!

Last night I had a really funny dream. I dreamt that I was at Disneyland, and that it was kind of set up like high school. Different classes were doing Crossfit, and my mom happened to be participating in "Helen" for the day. I was so proud of her! She did it in 50:00 minutes, which, given that she has a terminal illness, isn't bad at al

l. I was telling her about the dream this morning, and she thought it was hilarious. I told her she probably could do the workouts if she was just patient, and worked with a trainer. My mom said "ABSOLUTELY NOT!" But, she was curious about what it is about Crossfit that I like so much and what I think it has given me.

My best friend Mike got me into Crossfit at a time in my life where things were out of my control. My mom was really sick and in the hospital, I was unemployed, and diagnosed with infertility. The medicines they were putting me on caused me to lose my hair, throw up daily, and suffer from insane depression. It was not a good time to be Rachel. A year later, things haven't really changed. My mom is still sick, I'm still infertile, and the medicines are just as crappy. However, how I am able to face life and it's challenges has definitely gotten better. I have the energy to care about what fuel I put into my body, and I have made a schedule that I am sticking to with my workouts. I have made great friends and improved the friendships that I had prior to Crossfit because I am a better problem-solver and more independant. Mike also introduced our other best friend, Josh, to Crossfit as well. He has lost over 45 lbs and has made his health and well-being a priority again after 7 years in a high-stress job. We all call each other after our WODs to brag and commiserate. I'm lucky. And happy.

50 minute Helen or not, I think Crossfit can do a lot for people if they just let it. Drink the Kool-Aid!

Working Thru The Blah

After I wrote out all of my issues with my Zone program yesterday, I felt a lot better. However, last night I ended up eating the following for dinner: ground turkey, tomato sauce, and avacado. Seriously. It was yummy, but oy vey. I need to get my stuff together!

Today is Thursday and I am ditching yoga. I think I am getting burnt out, and I have to cook dinner for my fellow Zonies tonight, so I would like to make it a little less stressful than going to yoga straight to Kellie/Cassie.

WOD #53
Deadlift 5-5-5-5-5
125-135-155-155-155
(This was mostly for strength)

A few wks ago, my 3RM was 155. So 3 rounds of 5 at 155lbs was exciting.

WOD #54
For time: 18:31
500 m Row
12 Thrusters 53 lbs
12 Body Rows
12 Burpees
9 Thrusters 53 lbs
9 Body Rows
9 Burpees
6 Thrusters 53 lbs
6 Body Rows
6 Burpees

I hate thrusters, and burpees. I'm glad I finished this WOD, but it wasn't that much fun.